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Are You an Air Fairy?

So anyhoo, air fairies are formally known as sylphs.



It sounds like an ooey, gooey, toxin-filled BUG.

But let’s re-focus our thoughts on what they really are: Ladies weighing as much as a CLOUD.

And let’s also go back in time.

Do you remember lying on your back as a kid, watching the clouds?

When I did, I was thrilled to see lions and tigers and bears, oh my! But sometimes there was a flow-ey woman, and this my friend, is a SYLPH.

I know many lovely ladies who are real life SYLPHS, and they are the females who are light and airy, and strong as the wind.

But hang on a minute.

What does all this foo-foo talk mean?! I’m not speaking of sisters, aunts and neighbor ladies who are airy, fartsy, gassy and stinky. (Those would be the trolls who eat hotdogs with Fritos and drink too much beer).

I'm referring to real life air fairies. They are the bony, skinny, smart girls who become lawyers, accountants, authors, and computer programmers. And the only reason they weigh more than a pound is because of their heavy brains. Numbers, facts, and the wisdom of elephants is continually absorbed through osmosis into their braincells, causing their brains to become large, weighed down and extremely heavy.

It all starts at a young age when these little fairies are bumped into and stepped on by big toothed, hairy, meaty kids. These little ladies learn to SPEAK UP! activating the logical, speaking side of their brain so they don’t get sat on.

But it's not the meaty kids fault that they can't see air fairies (mist-like girls). It's the same as not hearing high pitched dog whistles. How are they supposed to notice a cloud of vapor sitting right next to them?!

So, thank God for this heavy/smart brain phenomenon, enabling air fairies to stay on the ground.

And it also must be noted, they are MOTIVATED AS HELL.

Duh, they have WIND energy! Wind is tireless and can do everything it wants.

So, if we were to put air fairy motivation on a soundtrack, it would sound something like this:

the never ending BELLLLLCH in the movie Elf. It just keeps going and going and going.

“Did you HEAR THAT?!?”

Let's check to see if you are an air fairy.

  1. Do you dream of flying?

  2. Do you love light blue?

  3. Do you feel like the sky is your real home?

  4. Are you sensitive and often feel alone?

  5. Do you hear/feel the words, “Let it go?”

  6. Do you have the strength of a mountain?

If your answer is yes to most of these, you are an air fairy!

Here is Kenzie, a real one.

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